Ancient Medicine Hat pictographs

These ancient works of art were discovered in my backyard this past weekend. I have documented them to be used for future scientific study. Let's see if we can discover anything new about the people who may have created these paintings.

It looks like mushrooms, or toadstools, may have formed a large part of their diet. I wonder how they prepared them? Perhaps with a little butter, shallots & red wine. 

Or maybe these mushrooms were poisonous. Used for getting rid of enemies? 

Alternatively, they may have been more the recreational type of mushrooms, maybe for a little hallucinating? (not that I know anything about that, I'm just speculating of course)

Apparently these people were blonde. They had interesting hairstyles. I wonder how they were able to form those spikes using products gathered from nature. Hmmm. Perhaps, these people influenced the more modern punk styles. Obviously, the females portrayed in this particular pictograph were royalty. 

Look at this! It appears that this ancient civilization had contact with some alien race. Perhaps they originated in space and were welcoming more of their own kind to this plant. Interesting that they already had such advanced written English skills. I wonder if they were visited by some Old World missionaries at some point. This could be evidence of diffusion of cultures in centuries & millenia past.

It looks like they also enjoyed the childhood ritual of "sleeping over". I wonder what significance this had in their culture. Was it a right of passage perhaps, or some display of bravery?

Very interesting. It appears they still got bored. Despite the wonders of nature surrounding them and the company of each other, they still could not find enough to entertain themselves. I wonder if this may have led to the extinction of their culture. Sad.

Thank you for visiting the Medicine Hat Pictograph Gallery. We've since determined that one of the artists was named Lizzie, accompanied by her friend A. The best estimate of the age of these paintings is 6 days. Unfortunately, rain has wiped away most of these creations. We are lucky to have documented them just in time.

Author's note: apparently I have way too much time on my hands these days!